An experience. When I was 9 years old, I turned my rubber boat while sailing in the ditch in front of our house. After a fierce battle with the dark and cold water, I stepped into a world full of light and intense Love, until a boyfriend pulled my hair out of the water.

Not knowing what to do with the experience, it was deeply repressed. In the shower, when I was 28, and out of the blue, the experience came back in full force. And that was a bit of a shock.

It was such an intense re-experience of the underwater experience that I was shaking on my legs. Not because drowning is so bad, on the contrary, but the experiences that lead to the light were so beautiful and intense … The moment that time no longer exists and everything is one. Every thought, every opinion ever expressed, I got everything back.

And whether that was not enough, experiencing the feeling of what each word or behavior he had ever spoken brought about to the other. And that came across differently than was experienced in the current body.

Have I ever talked about the voice of God? I was still young and reckless, on my way to a customer. At that time I never wore a seat belt, never. I waited impatiently for a traffic light on the dam in Amsterdam and suddenly heard very loud and clear “Put on your belt” .

I looked around me in surprise, looked behind the chairs, in the street, no one around. “Put on your belt!”. Again that loud voice in my head that was so loud that I could not believe that no one was tinkering in my ear. But again nobody around.

I started to doubt, strap on? Why would I do that? I never put on my belt.

And yes, my head was very loud again, “Put on your belt”. Now I really couldn’t get around it anymore. I had no idea who or what or where it came from but I finally followed the loud, clearly speaking Dutch voice.

After having driven 500 meters, with the belt on, a loud bang suddenly sounded and with the front wheels in a split, the car made a right-angled turn to the right, with three rotations, against three cars parked along the water of which the the last one, luckily, crashed into a lamppost, otherwise he would have landed on the roof of a houseboat.

Thank goodness I had the belt on, otherwise I would not have just gotten rid of it.

From this place, I Love you, I thank you.